Announcing Chas 4.0You've got gray!
Okay, the secret's out. Yesterday I turned 14,610 days old. Doesn't seem to matter really.
I'm still the same immature joker I was the day before. I still have most of my health, all my own hair (not even any gray yet!) and teeth, I don't need diapers on one end and Viagra on the other. I don't have to go into a cubicle or attend early-morning meetings with idiots. I like what I do for a living, though of course I wish it paid more.
I have a plethora of relatives and siblings that I actually like. I have the greatest and most interesting friends in all the world (see picture below), and I love them so much. I've done a number of things I've always wanted to do (not all of them of course, but a few really significant deeds on my personal agenda), and met some of the great writers, performers, artists and thinkers of our time. I've read some great books and seen some natural (and unnatural) wonders. I've cried some, but I've laughed more. I've lost some people, but there is always room in my heart for new ones. I have a great wife who loves me and thinks I'm a genius. Let's see you pull that off.
For a guy who never expected to live this long, I'm not doing half bad compared to some. On the yuppie scale of things, you might classify me as a failure. I'm not rich, I have no boat, no SUV, no screaming brats, no timeshare, no incompetent serfs to manage or business to run. I'm not world famous (or infamous), haven't ripped off investors even once, and I've got just enough of a sordid (but fun) past to keep me from running for public office.
On the other hand, I don't have the stress, the balding, the mistress, the bills, the job insecurity. I only deal with the public when I want to, and I only work for companies and people I like. I sleep in if I want to, and I notice things like the stars in the sky and the sun going down. I can do a lot of